Q: WHAT ARE THE
SMALL BUMPS AROUND A WOMAN'S NIPPLES FOR? A: It's Braille
for 'suck here'.
Q: WHAT IS AN
AUSTRALIAN KISS? A: It's the same
as a French kiss, but 'down under.'
Q: WHAT DO YOU
DO WITH 365 USED CONDOMS ? A: Melt them
down, make a tire, and call it a 'Good Year.'
Q: WHY WERE
HURRICANES NORMALLY NAMED AFTER WOMEN? A: Because when
they come, they're wild and wet. But when they go, they take your house
and car with them.
Q: WHY DO GIRLS
RUB THEIR EYES WHEN THEY GET UP IN THE MORNING? A: Because they
don't have any balls to scratch...
AND:
Q: WHAT IS A
MAN'S ULTIMATE EMBARRASSMENT? A : Running into
a wall with an erection and breaking his nose.
Defense Attorney:
Will you please state your age?
Little Old Lady:
I am 76 years old.
Defense Attorney:
Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened the night of April
1st?
Little Old Lady:
There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front porch on a warm
spring evening, when a young man comes creeping up on the porch and sat
down beside me.
Defense Attorney:
Did you know him?
Little Old Lady:
No, but he sure was friendly.
Little Old Lady:
He started to rub my thigh.
Defense Attorney:
Did you stop him?
Little Old Lady:
No, I didn't stop him.
Defense Attorney:
Why not?
Little Old Lady:
It felt good. Nobody had done that since my Albert died some 20 years
ago.
Defense Attorney:
What happened next?
Little Old Lady:
He began to touch my breasts.
Defense Attorney:
Did you stop him then?
Little Old Lady:
No, I certainly did not!
Defense Attorney:
Why ever not?
Little Old Lady:
His touching made me feel all alive and excited. I haven't felt that
good in years!
Defense Attorney:
What happened next?
Little Old Lady:
Well, I was feeling so "spicy" that I just laid down and told him "Take
me, young man. Take me now!"
Did he take you?
Little Old Lady:
Hell, no! He just yelled, "April Fool!" And that's when I shot him, the
little bastard.
